The Flight.

5-18-09:

I hear the alarm go off this morning and I had to remind myself not to hit the snooze button and I say outloud to no one “I am going to Spain”. I can’t believe I am actually going. The plan was always just a plan…and now, regardless if I am ready or even capable of doing this, I am going. I already have learned a few things I plan to call fun facts. Fun fact number one: You should probably know how to close all the buckles, gadgets, doohickies on your backpack before a trip across the Atlantic ocean. Not because the ocean makes a difference, but because you waste about ten minutes trying to figure out which buckle fits where and strap closes what. I was lucky to figure it out, but not after stressing a tad because I was wasting precious time to drink coffee and to triple (strike that, QUADRUPLE) check that I have everything I could possibly need. Passport-check. Driver’s license-check. Make up-check and double check. Clothes-check (enough? Who knows). Money and money belt-check. Gadgets, gizmo’s and everything else I probably won’t need-check. The biggest decision I had to make today was bring the self help book or not. It weighed on my mind…should I,? shouldn’t I? maybe I should randomly flip to a page in the self help book in question and make that decision. In the end, I threw it in the bag (the carry-on) and I know that I will regret having brought it. So, checks completed, decisions made and it is time to take off to the airporter. Worried I wouldn’t make it in time, I do and have a few minutes to spare. I am pretty sure I was able to make it because I ran a red light. This is only the second red light I have run in my lifetime (lie) . The first time I ran a red light I was rushing my sister Laurie to the hospital. She started having contractions and it was “time”. we loaded her in the car (and when I say loaded, we did..the girl weighed a ton). Her contractions had been 5 to 7 minutes apart and so our rush wasn’t as rushed as we made it. But, wanting to break the law (I think we had just watched Thelma and Louise) we jointly decided to be outlaws and we ran the red light (only after stopping, looking both ways and then continuing). To this day, I am not sure what the rush was about. She was in a labor another 15 hours and eventually gave birth by c-section. Zachary taught us to be patient outlaws. Anyway, I run the red light which triggered that memory.

It is funny the inner dialogue that occurs when you are getting ready for a trip. Things like “I will want to have that handy” or “I will be cold” or “bad choice in clothing for a plane ride” all cross your mind, in addition to a myriad of other thoughts that I don’t know if are appropriate for this pg-13 blog. But the thoughts come in and the most powerful thought this morning (aside from the self help decision) is what the eff am I doing? I don’t know. I just know that right now, I am on the air porter headed to san Francisco and I will let the winds guide me. No plans, no agenda, just my computer, my passport (check), Gone with the Wind (which I still contend is the biggest book I have ever (attempted) to read) and my self help book rented from the library. When I get to SFO I will buy a cup of coffee and that is about as far out as I intend to plan. The trip is a mystery. I will let you know, when I do, what unfolds. I have no expectations of what is in store.

I wasn’t able to get a cup of coffee at the airport, which is good because I needed to sleep on and off while flying to new york. I have a feeling Spain will see a cranky Val if I am not able to sleep a little more on the flight from New York to Spain. I think the best part about traveling is the brief intermittent conversations you have with complete strangers. Luck may have it, I am on the plane sitting next to some priest or monk or something. I don’t know. He is reading and praying and his books are written in another language. I think he may be a real big deal. But, funny thing is, he eats peanuts, drinks coffee and wears glasses. So, he is (as far as I can see) completely human. But, someone has to tell me, do they not believe in deoderant? I am just curious.
I am glad I brought the self help book now. I have been having some anxiety about the recent loss in my life and this book is reminding me that I have a choice and I can write the story. I also have been listening to the Tao Te Ching on audio book. I got to about verse 15 before I fell asleep and woke up in the 50’s. I am hoping that subliminal messages penetrated my brain during my slumber.
I still am freaking out. I wonder when I will calm down about my decision to take this trip. And, I have some anxiety about missing Nick. That didn’t cross my mind during my preparation, but for some reason I am having mommy feelings. I hope to be able to skype him tonight when I land. Tonight for you guys is 8 am for us Spaniards. Ya, we are the same, but different.


So, this international flight is a lot more accommodating than the domestics I have flown. First, we all have our own TV in the seat in front of us. We get head phones, blankets, pillows, ear plugs and cute little eye masks. The movie selection is decent (about to what Gran Torino). I know I need to sleep, but it is next to impossible in second class. Those first class bitches have it good. And they make us walk through their luxury on our way back to our meager seats. I am sitting next to a girl from the Dominican Republic. We don’t speak the same language so we do a lot of smiling and nodding.

I guess I could rant and rave about the plane flight for another several pages, but really? Who wants to read about my in flight meals and priests with a unique odor? I am getting excited to get there. Still have little bouts of panic about doing this. But, once I am there I will settle in, get some sleep and set out to explore to my hearts content. It will be radical.